Ryan Patman Means
Staff Sergeant, United States Army
Ryan was serving in Iraq at the time of his diagnosis on May 28, 2009.
Born in Atlanta to Al and Mary Jo Means, Ryan attended Christ the King grade school and graduated from Marist School in 1992. Ryan attended college at the University of Colorado at Boulder and later graduated from the University of Georgia.
Ryan worked in telecommunications for BellSouth and later for Williams Communications in New York City. It was on the morning of September 11, 2001, when two airliners crashed into the twin towers that set in motion Ryan’s incredible journey from his childhood neighborhood of Brookhaven to the neighborhoods of Iraq.
This journey began with Ryan’s close friendship with Adam White. Ryan and Adam were best friends since the first grade. They were fraternity brothers, roommates, drinking buddies, and climbing partners while students at Boulder. Their shared thirst for adventure was forged while bivouacking in a snowstorm near the summit of Mt. Ranier.
Adam and Ryan continued to climb together even after they both moved to New York City. On the day of the September 11th attacks, Ryan became greatly concerned when he could not contact Adam, as Adam worked in the North Trade Tower. Ryan rode his bike around the city for weeks posting flyers with Adam’s picture and searching the city’s hospitals. Ryan never found Adam and he was profoundly affected by his best friend’s death. He simply had to do something.
Ryan’s friends and family were shocked but not surprised when at the age of 31 he enlisted in the Army. Many remember Ryan as a child wearing fatigues everyday. For his 7th birthday his mother planned an army birthday party at a military themed restaurant. When Ryan was eight, two Marine Corps recruitment officers knocked on his parent’s front door because Ryan filled out and mailed in a recruitment postcard that he tore from a Boys Life magazine. Ryan hit the jackpot when an Army-Navy Surplus store opened in the neighborhood. To his parents great concern, he brought home various army helmets, pocket-knives, gas masks, nun-chucks, smoke grenades, and camo face paint. Brookhaven was kept very safe by their beloved nine year-old neighborhood commando.
Ryan did not take this decision to enlist lightly. Deep in Ryan’s heart was a love for his country and a great historical perspective of the sacrifices that young men and women have made to defend America’s peace and security. One night at the Buckhead Lions Club, Ryan listened intently to a speech about the global war on terror given by Major General Julian Burns. After the speech, Ryan introduced himself and informed General Burns of his decision to join the fight. General Burns was so fired up about Ryan’s commitment that he and Ryan both got down on the floor and pumped out fifty push-ups together.
After basic training and Airborne school at Fort Benning, Ryan was selected to tryout for Special Forces at Fort Bragg. At 32, Ryan was one of the oldest candidates in his class. The training was physically and mentally grueling. He emerged from the program successfully and graduated to become a member of one of the most elite fighting forces in the world.
During his time at Fort Bragg, Ryan and his buddies would often road-trip to Wrightsville Beach, North Carolina. One morning while overlooking his motel room balcony, Ryan spotted a beautiful young woman pull into the parking lot driving a convertible. Her name was Heather and she was radiant, demure, intelligent and gorgeous. Ryan had to utilize every bit of his elite Special Forces skills to allure her into his life. Mission accomplished.
Their love affair was easy. The two simply decided to get married while holding hands and walking around Chastain Park. After an intimate, flip-flop-wearing courthouse wedding, they settled in Clarksville, Tennessee, just outside of his base at Fort Campbell. Their first child Elizabeth was one year old and Heather was three months pregnant with their second child when Ryan was deployed to Iraq in January, 2009.
Ryan’s letters from Iraq did not elaborate on his daily missions and he very much downplayed the fact that he was in harm’s way. Although he was a courageous and tough warrior, Ryan felt great empathy for the Iraqi people and he particularly felt compassion for the Iraqi children. He always made an effort to share things like lip balm, toilet paper, soccer balls and school supplies with the kids. His was living out his dream but his letters always ended with his desire to be back home with Heather and having bath-time with Elizabeth.
After six months in Iraq, Ryan noticed that he was jaundiced and was airlifted to Baghdad for further testing. Ryan was diagnosed with Cholagiocarcinoma at the end of May and immediately medivaced to Walter Read Army Hospital in Washington DC for initial treatment, and later to Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center in New York City for surgery. He was met in New York by his immediate family and his wife Heather, who was nine months pregnant.
Directly across the street from Sloan-Kettering Hospital is New York Presbyterian Hospital. This was very convenient for the Means Family because Heather went into labor and was wheeled across the street by an Army Special Forces liason officer. He then ran back across the street to Sloan-Kettering where he pulled out Ryan’s IV’s and wheeled him into Heather’s delivery room just in time for the birth of their second daughter, Sophie Ryan Means.
Ryan, Heather, 18 month-old Elizabeth and newborn Sophie spent the following days convalescing. Ryan would show his wife and daughters his old New York City haunts and tell stories about his old friend Adam. And everyday after their long easy strolls through Central Park, Ryan would bring his children home for bath-time.
On the morning of July 7th, the sun rose in New York City as Ryan’s soul passed on to heaven. His wife Heather and his parents Mary Jo and Al held him closely.
Ryan was not in pain as his once strong body relinquished its long and courageous struggle to stay with us. For six days Ryan fought with the strength and honor of a Special Forces soldier, but the complications from surgery to remove the cancerous tumor in his bile duct were far to great.
We will remember Ryan as a sweet son, a loving husband, a doting father, a wild-man brother, an unwavering friend, and a fearless soldier. But most of all, we will remember Ryan as our hero. Ryan ended all of his letters with a simple thought: “Keep on rockin’ in the free world.”
Ryan is survived by his immediate family including wife Heather Means; daughters Elizabeth and Sophia Means; parents Al and Mary Jo Means; and brothers Alfie, Tommy, and Michael Means, who were always the closest of brothers. Ryan is also survived by his many extended family members around the country.
The funeral of Ryan Patman Means will be at The Cathedral of Christ the King, Monday, July13th, 2009 at 10:00 AM. Christ the King Church is 2699 Peachtree Road, NE, Atlanta, Georgia 30305. A reception will follow in the parish hall.
The Sophie and Elizabeth
Means Education Fund:
Ryan Means was so gung-ho about the military, he ripped out a recruitment card from a magazine, filled it out and mailed it in.
A few days later, two Marine Corps officers knocked on his parent’s door in Atlanta, ready to enlist their son. His mother, Mary Jo, sent the officers away.
After all, her son was only 9.
Young Means revered the armed services. As a kid growing up in Atlanta, he’d frequently don fatigues. At Halloween, he packed heat as G.I. Joe. And every day, he and younger brother Michael would dig foxholes in the back yard, filling it with plastic guns, knives, nunchucks, throwing stars and gas masks.
“It’s like we were preparing for World War III,” Michael Means quipped.
In first grade, young Means formed a lasting friendship with Adam White at Christ the King School, said older brother Tommy Means. As young adults, they were fraternity brothers, roommates and climbing partners while students at the University of Colorado at Boulder.
Mr. Means left Colorado to return to Georgia, graduating from the University of Georgia in 1997. He then took a job with BellSouth in Atlanta before moving to New York City in 1999, where he and Mr. White continued their thirst for adventure.
Mr. White was killed in the September 11, 2001, attacks on the World Trade Center. So in 2003, Mr. Means — with his best friend’s initials tattooed on his rib cage — enlisted in the Army. He was two months shy of his 31st birthday.
“He was not going to sit by idly and not do anything,” friend Josh Cobb said. “The choice to join the Army was something he thought about his entire life.”
Throughout his life, Mr. Means never backed down from a challenge, his three brothers said. He took on boys twice his size at summer camp in Tallulah Falls. He biked more than 100 miles across Ireland. He bivouacked in a snowstorm near the summit of Mount Rainier in Washington.
“He pushed his body as hard as he could at all times,” brother Tommy Means said. “He had such an intense love of life.”
Brother Michael Means called his older sibling an inspiration.
“He taught me how to drive,” he said. “He taught me how to point and shoot a BB gun. He taught me how to write and how to read. He was just always there for me. He made me stand a little taller, speak a little louder.”
Although he lived life hard, he laughed even harder, his brothers said. And sometimes, that meant pulling pranks.
At his older brother Alfie’s wedding rehearsal dinner in 2002, Mr. Means delivered an unusual toast. He cranked up Elvis Presley’s “A Little Less Conversation” and danced. “It was as if a choreographer for a boy band was dancing,” Tommy Means chuckled. “He did a split at the end and tore his pants.”
One Halloween while a UGA student, Mr. Means donned a hockey mask, wrote “Boo” on his buttocks and rode his bicycle around campus naked.
Alfie Means said he’ll remember his brother’s resolve. He went into the Army as a recruit, not an officer, even though he was a college graduate. At age 33, he advanced to the Special Forces, also known as Green Berets.
Mr. Cobb, who will deliver the eulogy for his best friend, said the world has lost a special person. “If you said the name Ryan Means to anyone who knew him … a smile or a laugh would emerge immediately,” he said. “People liked him, loved him. There will never be anyone like him — ever.”
Additional survivors include wife Heather Means
and daughters Elizabeth and Sophie Means, of Clarksville, Tenn.; and parents
Al and Mary Jo Means of Atlanta.
We will remember Ryan as a loving husband, a doting father, a sweet son, a wild-man brother, an unwavering friend, and a fearless soldier. But most of all, we will remember Ryan as our hero.
Ryan is the son of Al and Mary Jo Means who are winter residents of La Quinta, California. Ryan is also survived by his wife, Heather Means; and daughters, Elizabeth and Sophie.
A Funeral Mass was held at 10:00 AM at the Cathedral of Christ the King, 2699 Peachtree Road, NE Atlanta, Georgia 30305, on Monday, July 13, 2009. A reception followed in the parish hall.
In lieu of flowers, memorial donations in Ryan's name may be made to: The Sophie and Elizabeth Means Education Fund: c/o Alfie Means, 3788 Powers Ferry Rd. NW, Atlanta, Georgia 30342 (Sophieandelizabeth.com); Athens Y Camp, 1000 Y Camp Rd., Tallulah Falls, Georgia 30573, (706) 754-6912; Special Operations Warrior Foundation, P.O. Box 13483, Tampa, Florida 33681-3483 (www.specialops.org/).
MEANS, RYAN PATMAN
Posted: 8 October 2009
Photo By Holly, October 2009